Episode 69: When You Struggle to "Hear Him"

hear him mental health tips Aug 15, 2022


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“Our Father knows that when we are surrounded by uncertainty and fear, what will help us the very most is to hear His Son.” Russel M. Nelson

We are surely surrounded by uncertainty and fear these days. Hearing Him has become even more vital in recent years. Unfortunately, hearing Him can be difficult even if you are actively trying to increase that ability. I often see women adding more to their plate when they are trying to hear Him more. Trying to do more when they start feeling inadequate in any area of their life.

For example, many women will put unrealistic expectations on themselves as they increase their scriptures study. They will plan to be in the scriptures even more. Now, I am not saying that the scriptures won’t help you, but what what I am saying is it’s not about doing more. It is about where you are doing the work from that will make the difference.

As a mental health therapist, I have noticed there are reasons why women struggle to hear Him in their lives. I want to share with you three specific mental states that women find themselves in that are causing them to struggle to hear Him. None of them have anything to do with doing more or adding more into their lives. 


Anxious, cluttered, racing thoughts are not conducive to hearing the Savior. Think about it, how will you be able to hear the still small voice of the Spirit if you are in a room with blaring music and flashing strobe lights. Which is what anxiety thoughts can feel like sometimes. That still small voice will convey the messages of the Savior to you if you can hear them.

When women try to hear Him from an anxiety state of mind they will often question themselves and whether they are just having their own thoughts or if that really was the Spirit talking. When they question it they don’t act on that revelation. Those thoughts are too uncertain to warrant action. If you are not acting on revelation given, you won’t progress in your ability to hear Him.


When you are in a state of experiencing your inner critic you are having a flood of negative thoughts about yourself. You don’t feel good enough for any situation. You lose motivation, desire and energy to want to do much of anything. Can you relate to that feeling? 

If you are in this state, then the Spirit is going to have a hard time penetrating those types of thoughts. When we continue to allow these thoughts to persist, then the ability to hear Him seems even more distant. Our Heavenly Parents did not send us here alone. They knew we needed help and that we have the capacity to receive that help. We too need to know that we can. We also need to know of our own ability to hear and recognize His guidance.


Do you have too much on your plate but feel like you should be doing more? The women I work with feel like they are drowning in the “should’s” in their life and can’t even see which direction to go. They feel as though everything is vital and they should be doing it all. This state of overwhelm can really be tricky because this is where we start thinking everything needs to be done.

Perhaps you feel like you should be farther along in your life than you are. Or that your life should be having different results. Maybe you feel that if you did more of everything you would gain more of everything.

These "shoulds" can push your thoughts into a spiral of forcing things to happen that aren’t in alignment with what God’s will is. These types of thoughts drown out the Spirit and the struggle with being able to hear Him sets in. When in all reality the Spirit can direct us as create plans or set goals by prompting us to know where our priorities should be. Where we should focus our time and energy. When we have that guidance we will actually accomplish more. Hear Him more. 

 Each of these states of mind have one thing in common. They all come from the natural man. When we are being influenced by the carnal mind that was placed in us at the fall of Adam and Eve we are being influenced by the natural man. It’s part of the the plan of salvation and what gives us agency to choose by presenting an alternative decision.

In the guide to the scriptures it says the Natural Man is “A person who chooses to be influenced by the passions, desires, appetites, and senses of the flesh rather than by the promptings of the Holy Spirit. Such a person can comprehend physical things but not spiritual things. All people are carnal, or mortal, because of the Fall of Adam and Eve. Each person must be born again through the Atonement of Jesus Christ to cease being a natural man.”

Along with that, President Nelson taught, “It takes persistent, rigorous spiritual work to repent and to put off the natural man through the Atonement of Jesus Christ.” Recognizing when you are in the natural man state and being influenced by your own earthly thoughts and not the Spirit is hard and takes some practice and awareness skills.

Furthermore, Elder Kacher said, “An overdependence on ourselves can impede our ability to access the powers of heaven. But as we move toward true faith in Jesus Christ, our mindset begins to change. We recognize that obedience and faith in the Savior qualify us to have His Spirit always to be with us." With His trust comes increased light. This light guides our journey and allows us to see more clearly the path we should take.

Learning the tools to change your mindset from one of the natural man state to spiritual state of having faith in Jesus Christ is vital in learning to hear Him more in your life. Elder Kopiscke reminds us that, "We will experience stress and turmoil because we live in a fallen world with a fallen body." No one is exempt from experiencing the phenomenon of living in a fallen world with a fallen body so it is your responsibility to develop tools that help you change your mindset. Elder Kopiscke also said, "Challenges often indicate a need for additional tools and support and are not a character defect."

I want to offer you some additional tools and support in learning to hear him more in your life. Which is why I am doing a FREE 5-days to Hear Him Challenge. In this challenge you will dive into all of these concepts in depth and learn what you can do to put off the natural man and be born again through the Atonement of Christ.

The challenge will start August 21 and run for 5 days. You will have the opportunity to join the challenge live each evening at 7:00 pm MST or watch the recorded replay at your convenience. The goal for this challenge is for you to leave with 5 key strategies to hear Him more in your life so you can:

Prioritize your day through the Spirit 

Receive inspiration to lead your family

Access Christ's power mentally and physically

This is a free challenge so there is no cost but there will be prizes. All you need to do is register then you will receive an email and a video about how to get the most out of the challenge. I would also recommend sending that link to a friend too because challenges are always more fun with friends. Or share it on your social media and get a group together and learn more from each other. Join the challenge today and learn to calm your anxious thoughts, doubt your inner critic, and relieve yourself of unnecessary overwhelm.

LDS Mental Health Skills Membership Waitlist


Learn to become a Divine Receiver with Mental Health Skills so you can:

stop wasting time getting distracted and accomplish more in less time to be productive
become a vessel for the Savior to help your struggling loved ones or improve relationships
heal and manage emotions to cope with life's challenges and spend more quality time doing what you love
have Consistent Spiritual Habits that help you discern personal revelation and feel peace in your unchangeable situations


This membership is only open once a year. Don't miss the opportunity to know when it opens. Drop your name and email address below to be notified